Monday, December 8, 2008

here it comes...

We knew it would happen someday. My ennui and confusion about this pregnancy couldn't last every single moment of every single day. There was bound to be a day when I would find myself giggling, grinning ear to ear and marvelling at how blessed we are. Feeling as though I'd downed a bottle of Felix Felicis, today is that day.

Waking up this morning to the mental milestone of 12 weeks was a perfect start. One small step for a pregnant woman, one giant leap for *this* pregnant woman! Although I'm now much further than I was with any previous losses, this week seemed like such a foreign threshold to cross and yet here I am, walking through that door and glowing on the other side.

Glowing, with a healthy (and big!) baby kicking me on the inside. I can't feel it yet, of course, but I could certainly see it this morning at our NT scan. Those long spindly legs kicking, those adorable little fingers at the baby's mouth, that heart - THAT HEART! - thumping away, 4 glorious chambers beating perfectly to sound the most beautiful music a mother can hear.

The most beautiful music a mother can hear...in her own home. My doppler also arrived today and with a little fiddling there it was: woosh woosh woosh. My belly soaking with gel, underwear pulled down around my knees, entirely without grace and yet feeling SO full of grace. Just so full.

Full of life, overflowing with love. My heart beats stronger knowing that today another heart still beats below it. Within it.


(Please re-direct me to this post when complaining about cankles, stretchmarks and hemorrhoids.)

30 comments:

Lisa said...

That is awesome.

Niki said...

How wonderful! Wishing you many more of these moments over the next 6 months!

Jennifer said...

This post makes me happy. :)

Emily said...

Beautiful! Enjoy it...

Emily said...

Congratulations!!!

mylifechronicles said...

Oh... this post gives me soooo much hope. Ah... the 12wk mark... seems so so far away from where I am (6w3d). Can't wait to reach there. I am so glad that you are feeling good. Hope they last all through the PG.

Kelly said...

Well, you just turned me into a weepy mass! Good/happy weepy though!

Lexie said...

Both DH and I are just thrilled beyond belief for you guys! We keep you both in our thoughts and prayers every single day!

Seriously? - Erin said...

Congratulations. 12 weeks is a huge milestone. Thanks for this post, because I was about to start complaining (insomnia and a baby that's up all night).

I didn't buy a doppler but I can hear the baby through my stehascope now! Isn't it amazing? I am so happy for you.

ashley said...

How great it must feel to reach this point after all you have been through. I hope the second and third trimester give you as much joy as this one has. Congrats!

Karen said...

What a great post, I am so happy for you! You give me hope!!!

Jessatsea said...

awhhh now I have tears in my eyes! :)
love you and congrats on that beautiful music beating from within!

Delia said...

Aw, I'm so happy for you!!

Genevieve said...

YAYYY. these posts make me so happy. with each passing week I get happier and happier. I didn't know my little heart could get any bigger, but alas it keeps growing.
sigh.
and isn't the doppler awesome!!!!!!
Poor Belle was bombarded with sonar pings at least 2-3 times a day till at least 25 weeks. it just never gets old.
whoosh whoosh whoosh.
sweet sweet music.

KandiB said...

Just had our NT last Friday...it was a big turning point for me, too (12w6days). Up till now, I've been so hesitant to get excited, to allow myself to feel. I'm still hesitant, but its happening. Bit by bit. Hearing that heartbeat and seeing those feet and hands and eyes and nose and mouth certainly help! Congrats.

womb for improvement said...

Phase one completed! Enjoy it.

almond said...

This makes my heart fill with delight.

Kelli said...

aw, congratulations!! That is wonderful and I continue to keep my fingers crossed and have you in my thoughts. I'm so glad your baby is doing well and is healthy!

Bean said...

Congratulations, that is great news!

Amy C said...

Yay!!! I am so happy for yu!!!

andbabybmakesthree said...

Awwwww! Wonderful! Just wonderful!

D

Jennifer said...

I am so happy for you Amber!

Yay!

MrsAmandaMqn said...

This is great! I can't wait to read many more milestones from you!

G said...

this made me smile - i am just bursting with joy for you - it is so incredible, this journey.

In Due Time said...

Hope you have a Merry Christmas!

ICLW

Xbox4NappyRash said...

Enjoy it.

You've earned it.

Lisa said...

Hey girlfriend - how are you doing?

Pregnant...How Did You Do That? said...

Whoosh Whoosh! How fun! I long for those days and you give me hope and desire to continue this journey!

Enjoy Enjoy! It is fabulous!!!! Enjoy!

God Bless you all!

Marcuej said...

Amber, you are such a great writer! I really enjoy reading your blog. I'm so happy things are going along so well for you.

Greg and Heather said...

What a sweet beautiful post. Congratulations!

http://adventuresofbabymaking.blogspot.com/